Dealing with divorce during the holidays

Added: Zaynab Camp - Date: 16.09.2021 10:01 - Views: 13108 - Clicks: 2675

The holidays are typically a time for celebration with friends and family. To help you enjoy this holiday season instead of dreading it, here are 21 tips you can use today to survive your divorce and the holidays. Even in the best of times, the holidays can be a bit hectic. They can feel overwhelming! Be patient with yourself, your kids and the rest of your family as you navigate the holidays.

Many of my clients who are celebrating the holidays for the first time as a single parent will get tied up with the idea that holidays can only happen on the official day marked on the calendar.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

However, with a bit of advance planning more about that in hint 16you may decide that Thanksgiving will actually happen the Saturday before the fourth Thursday of November so you can celebrate it with your. Having an early Thanksgiving even has the added benefit of allowing you to avoid the crowd buying their last-minute turkey and fixings! Most kids love the holidays and having double the holidays — one with Mom and one with Dad — might be something the kids think is great!

Another way to enjoy the holiday season is to focus on those less fortunate than you. I can guarantee that when you focus on providing joy for those less fortunate than you an amazing thing happens; you forget about your troubles and appreciate what you do have even more.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

Gift giving is often a big part of the holiday season. With separation and divorce, the funds available for gift giving are usually less than they were before. Sometimes the gift of time and attention means more than any store-bought gift ever could. For a lot of people going through divorce, it can seem strange to experience any emotion other than some form of upset. Divorce is an upsetting event that can be almost all consuming. You deserve to be happy and enjoy the holidays Dealing with divorce during the holidays as much as everyone else does.

The message here is if you need a little extra help to get your holidays to feeling merrier, be sure and ask for it. With divorce so many things change. Some of these changes are not so comfortable, but some of these changes are good and might even be fun.

What new family tradition can you introduce this holiday season to keep things fun? When I got divorced, my new tradition was spending Christmas with my family. We had almost always spent Christmas with my in-laws when I was married to my first husband.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

Different is just different. If you nix the guilt and embrace the new way your holidays will be, then your kids will enjoy the holidays too. One of the things I always tell my clients is that their divorce is between them and their former spouse. She celebrates the holidays with the kids at another time. What can you do to tweak these traditions so that you can still have them? For example, maybe you have had a holiday tradition of going skiing.

You may decide to play ski jumping on the Wii, have a marshmallow fight instead of a snowball fight and drink hot chocolate afterwards. It can be tempting to crawl into a cave and hibernate during our first holidays alone — especially if your ex has the. However, I urge you to resist the temptation.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

You very well might. The funny thing about the holiday season is that it coincides with the cold and flu season. This, along with the stress that usually accompanies divorce, makes you a bit more susceptible to catching a bug. So, take good care of yourself by getting plenty of rest, adequate exercise and good nutrition in addition to all the holiday goodies.

Since your gift giving list has decreased by at least one, why not add yourself to your list? For many, the holidays are a celebration of faith and spending some time remembering this might be just what you need to experience a bit more of the holiday spirit. The most important thing to have when you want something to happen at a certain time is a plan.

Wanting to have happy holidays requires a plan too. Developing an attitude of gratitude does wonders for the way you view the world. This was one of the most important skills I developed when I got divorced. It helped me to be more positive and proactive Dealing with divorce during the holidays changing the things that needed to be changed not just at the holidays, but year-round.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

People like the cooler weather, giving and receiving gifts, decorations. Whatever it is that you love most about the holiday season, figure out a way to get more of it. When I ask my clients this question I hear answers like shopping, parties, decorating, watching football, Christmas lights and caroling. Your life is in the midst of a major change. For most people, separation and divorce bring increased responsibilities along with decreased financial means and free-time. Be sure and factor these facts in this holiday season. It will also make it easier to develop realistic plans.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

See tip Dealing with divorce during the holidays The holiday season can easily be a blur of activities that pretty much start as soon as the jack-o-lantern is off the front porch on the morning of November 1st. Prevent the blur by focusing on just one holiday at a time. Avoid multi-tasking and the potential for overwhelm by taking the holidays just as they come, one…at…a…time. Choose one of the tips to implement immediately. Sometimes seeing a long list of tips can cause us to start to gloss over them. I know these tips work, so take a moment now and choose one of them that you can implement right now and then do it!

Choose a tip that addresses your biggest concern about the holidays and put it to use. Come back to the tips frequently throughout the holiday season. Keep these tips handy and visit them throughout the holidays anytime you could use a little bit of help. Karen Finn, a divorce coach and advisor helping people just like you who are dealing with the stress and pain of divorce.

You can my newsletter list for free weekly advice. Life After Divorce. Be patient Even in the best of times, the holidays can be a bit hectic. Focus on others Another way to enjoy the holiday season is to focus on those less fortunate than you. Let happiness happen For a lot of people going through divorce, it can seem strange to experience any emotion other than some form of upset.

Make new family traditions With divorce so many things change. The result? Take care of your health The funny thing about the holiday season is that it coincides with the cold and flu season. Plan ahead The most important thing to have when you want something to happen at a certain time is a plan. Cultivate gratitude Developing an attitude of gratitude does wonders for the way you view the world.

What are you thankful for this holiday season? What do you love most about the holiday season? What activities put you in the holiday mood? Now, how can you do more of these? Be realistic Your life is in the midst of a major change. One holiday at a time The holiday Dealing with divorce during the holidays can easily be a blur of activities that pretty much start as soon as the jack-o-lantern is off the front porch on the morning of November 1st. Articles Search.

Dealing with divorce during the holidays

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